Perfect Wedding Ceremony and Your Perfect Marriage

Wedding guests have important work to do your wedding and throughout your life together. They are there to witness the promises you're making to one another. They come to celebrate the love that transforms your life. If you've chosen wisely, they will be there to support your marriage forever.

It would be nice if the wedding guest list was started with who do I want to come to my wedding. But too often the wedding guest list is started with who do I have to have at my wedding. I know you and your parents have entertainment responsibilities. But the fact is you need guests who will do the work they're responsible for when they say that they'd love to attend your wedding! So frame the question(s) differently.

• Who are the people who have stood by me and encouraged me as I was growing up?
• Who has been with me as I slogged my way forward to this point?
• Who are the people who have been active participants in our relationship?
• Who are the people that we can't envision a life without?

If people really are, as the saying goes, friends for a reason, a season or a lifetime, you want mostly lifetime friends at your wedding. Sprinkle the guest list with the others if you want, but the majority of your wedding guests should be those people who have already shown you that they will keep showing up.

We all have odd and quirky and sometimes difficult friends whom we love dearly. Certainly you'll want them with you. But mostly, you want the steadfast, fun-loving, you-loving friends to celebrate this important moment and this monumental decision.

Here's the surprising thing, I don't care what anyone else says: You really do get to have people who will support you forever at your wedding. They'll be thrilled by your wedding service, moved by your wedding vows, dance like crazy at your reception and call you after the honeymoon to say how happy they are for you. They'll show up in hospital rooms and at children's parties and barbecues in the back yard. They're your friends. Gather them 'round, and get married!