Traditional
Before we look at some of the non-traditional wedding invitation phrases, here's how you would 
word the invitation if the bride's parents were paying for the ceremony and were still married.
Mr. and Mrs. Joe Acme
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
at the Missouri Botanical Gardens
Saturday, the Thirtieth of June
Five o'clock in the evening
Typically, whoever is paying the bills will be considered the host of the event. As you'll see in some of the other samples that can get confusing when the couple is paying or when the entire family is sharing the expenses.
One note about the above sample: if the groom's parents were paying for the ceremony instead of the bride's then you would simply exchange the parents' names.
Non-Traditional Hosting
As mentioned above, crediting the hosts can be hard with your wedding invitation phrases. Let's look at how to handle the wording for some specific situations. Incidentally, we'll only be changing the portion of the phrasing that deals with the names. The lower half including the details of the event can remain the same, regardless of how the hosts need to be handled.
Both Parents Sharing Costs
When the parents are sharing hosting duties, you would use wording as below:
Mr. and Mrs. Joe Acme
and
Mr. and Mrs. David Smith
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their children
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
As far as which parents' names go first, you could choose to list the parents who are spending the most first. Typically, however, the brides' parents would be named first. Discuss your decision in advance with the parents so no one gets their feelings hurt.
Couple Paying for the Wedding
Many couples today are footing the bill for their own celebration either because they are waiting longer to get married, they want more control over the planning, or because their families are not in the financial position to pay for a wedding. When the couple is hosting their own event, the wedding invitation phrases would look like the following example:
You are cordially invite
to celebrate the wedding of
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
Notice in the example the parents names are not mentioned. If you do want to acknowledge them, you could choose the following alternative:
Together with their parents,
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
invite you to attend their wedding
Additionally, if you have children, you might not want to leave them out of the invitation either. Parents sometimes add "together with their children" to the invitation or use their child's name as the host of the event.
Parental Relationships
Assuming you are going to add your parents to the invitations, you may end up facing another non-traditional problem: divorce and/or remarriage. To be fair to your parents, you want to make their relationship as clear as possible in the wedding invitation phrases. You may also want to include the stepparents in the invitation, especially if they are helping to pay for the expenses. Below are some examples to illustrate how to handle these situations tactfully.
Divorced Parents/No Stepparents
In this case, the parents' names are separated. If only one parent is paying for the wedding, the other parent's name can be omitted.
Mr. Joe Acme
and
Ms. Josephine Acme
request your presence at the wedding of
their daughter,
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
Divorce with Remarriage
If the remarried couple is covering the expenses, the first sample wedding invitation phrases 
would be appropriate. If both parents are sharing the costs, they should be treated as hosts as shown in the second example below.
Mr. and Mrs. Joe Acme
invite you to the wedding of
Jane Elizabeth Acme,
the daughter of
Mr. Joe Acme and Ms. Josephine Acme,
to
John Robert Smith
Mr. and Mrs. Joe Acme
and
Ms. Josephine Acme
request your presence at the wedding of
their daughter
Jane Elizabeth Acme
to
John Robert Smith
Deceased Parent
Unfortunately, both parents are not always going to have the honor of sharing this special day with their children. However, they can still be remembered on the invitation. The sample below provides an example of the wedding invitation phrases that would work in this case.
Mr. Joe Acme and the late Josephine Acme
invites you to the wedding of
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
Other Examples
While the above scenarios tend to cause the most trouble for couples deciding on wedding invitation phrases, the following examples can also pose their own challenges.
Informal Invitation
Not everyone wants to have a formal wedding. Informal invites can be wording more casually to reflect the difference in tone for the event.
Jane and John
would be delighted
if you would join them
for their wedding
at the Missouri Botanical Garden
on Saturday, June 30th
at 5:00 pm
A reception will follow
Destination Wedding
Even though you only a small portion of your guest list will be able to attend a destination wedding, sending invitations is still important. Make sure to include reception information on the invite, too. This is when most of your guests will be able to celebrate your special event.
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
invite you to attend their wedding
in Venice, Italy
Saturday, the Thirtieth of June
Five o'clock in the evening
A reception will be held
to honor the new Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Friday, the Sixth of July
Four o'clock in the evening
at
Fiesta Hotel
Reception Only
Some couples choose not to have a formal ceremony. Instead, they invest their wedding ceremony expenses into having an even more wonderful reception their friends and family members can enjoy. Below is an example of the wedding invitation phrases for such an event.
Jane Elizabeth Acme
and
John Robert Smith
Will become Mr. and Mrs. Robert Smith
In a private ceremony
On Saturday, June 30th
At noon
Celebrate this event with them at an evening reception
On June 30th at six o'clock in the evening
At
Fiesta Hotel
although there are many challenges to putting together the appropriate wording for your invitations, the samples above should help in selecting the right wedding invitation phrases for your needs so you can concentrate on other parts of your planning.
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